Portrait Painting Homework I

There is something exceptionally daunting about a blank canvas. Even when you know what you are going to paint. It's just at the moment of actually starting I have this spiking fear of failure. Which I admit is ridiculous. Because really who is around to judge me other than myself? And why should I WANT to judge me? Painting classes have made me realize that I have unrealistically high expectations for myself when it comes to doing new things. This is where I think that the description for "Capricorn" actually finally rings true for me. I'm a perfectionist. Which is horrible, because I don't give myself space to grow. To start off awful at something and work hard to become better at it. I have a history of "trying" things and then quitting them. I'd like to change this fact about me so you'll likely see me hammering away at attempting to paint and learn photograpy this year. These two things are my focus. 

So upon the ending of my first oil painting class our teacher suggested that we go home and that sometime during the week we attempt to paint a self portrait. So in keeping with my resolution this year to really try. Here is my attempt:

All set up and ready! Now, the hard part, that first stroke.

The final product. Wish I had thought to take a few inbetween shots.

Well, I think I captured some likeness, but I need to work on values. It will be interesting to see how the next one turns out. I will just have to keep trying.